Conversations With My Son - Part I
Dear Friend,
A few days ago I took my son to his gymnastics
class. I'm not always able to do so - but this time
I was "da man."
Just before the class the teacher, Miss Tina, told me,
"Glad you could make it. We have awards for all the kids
today. They get trophies."
Awards for ALL the kids, I thought to myself. ALL of them
get trophies. Man, that's not the way things were when I was
a kid. Oh, well. Before passing judgment, let me observe.
The class lasted about an hour and consisted of various
tests. At the end each kid got to stand on a gymnastic-pad
victory stand and was presented with a trophy, then a
certificate.
The point of this was clear to me from a "coaching" point
of view. Here's the "psychology" behind it:
1. Make every kid feel like a winner.
2. Give every child the experience of winning.
3. Give every child at least one moment in which he/she feels important -
while perhaps silently "wishing" that the child then understands that it's
fun to win and wants to do it all the time. [Note: Highly unlike that this
part of the "psychology" was thought of at all.]
4. Make sure no child ever feels bad because he or she didn't "win."
Now, for a group of three and four-year olds, I have no problem with
what went on in the class. I think it's fine to give ALL the kids trophies
and certificates. But I also think that age 3 or 4 is NOT too early to
begin explaining how you REALLY become a winner in the real world.
And so, while driving Frank home in my gas-polluting beast, otherwise known
as a HUMMER, I engaged him in the following conversation:
"Frank, did you have a good class?
"Yeah."
"Was it fun?"
"Yeah."
"That's good. I like watching you. You have great talent. Now let me ask you
a question."
"Okay."
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"Did it feel good getting that trophy?"
"Yeah. I like it."
"Would you like to get A LOT of trophies?"
"Yeah. I want a lot, a lot, a lot of trophies. I want twenty fifteen
thirty seven trophies."
"That's good. Now, do you want to know HOW you can get all those
trophies?"
"Yeah."
"Okay, well let me tell you a little story. One day there was a
little boy growing up who was just like you. He used to go
swimming and compete with the other kids. Most of the time he never
won anything but the other kids did. Then one day he WON the blue
ribbon. He was very happy. And then the little boy's mommy came over
and told him that he needed to be thankful that he won this blue ribbon
because most kids never win anything."
"Uh-huh," said Frank, listening intently.
"And then do you know what the little boy's mommy told him?"
"What?"
"She told him, 'It's good you won this ribbon, but if you want to win A LOT
of them, you've got to do three things. Do you know what those three things
are Frank."
"Huh-uh."
"Well, the boy's mommy said, 'Son, FIRST you come up with a goal or a
dream of what you want to do. You tell yourself "I want to be a champion" or
"I want to be the best."
"I want to be a champion," said Frank.
"That's true," I said. "So you understand the first thing. Very good. Now,
the second thing is you need to think about your goal a lot. You make a
picture of it in your mind. You play with that picture and see if you can
make it REALLY REALLY BIG. The more you think about that picture and the
more you make it REALLY REALLY BIG - the easier for you to get it."
"Yeah," said Frank, with great interest.
"You understand?" I asked.
"Yeah, I understand."
"Good. And then guess what? The little boy's mommy told him something very,
very important. Do you want to know what she told him?"
"Yeah, what did she tell him?"
"She said, 'Son, if you set a goal and think about it REALLY BIG, then
there's only ONE THING left to do. And that one thing is that you work
harder than anyone else. If you have a goal and you think about it a lot and
you work harder than anyone else, then you can win any trophy in life that
you want. You can get anything you want in life if you think you can and if
you follow these three steps. Do you understand?"
"I understand."
"And do you know what happened to that little boy after his mommy told him
this?"
"Huh-uh. What happened?"
"That little boy did exactly what his mommy told him and he went on to
become champion of the world. He got a big, big trophy for that. Do you like
that?"
"I like it. That's good," said Frank.
"And today was good," I said. "Everyone got a trophy. It feels good, huh?
But most of the time in life, it doesn't work that way. If you want to win A
LOT of trophies, remember what the little boy's mommy told him. She was a
very smart woman. And her little boy was smart, too, because he did what
his mommy taught him to do."
Now, I seriously doubt that any of the other parents told their child a
story like I told Frank. I suppose this type of conversation with children
is RARE. Yet I honestly believe it's one of the MOST important conversations
you can have with a child - and age 3 is NOT too young to start. Giving each
kid a trophy is fine - but an explanation of how you get more is equally
important. Children, like adults, need to be told exactly how to ...
Kick Butt & Take Names!
P.S.: Winning isn't something that happens by chance. Success often comes
disquised as luck - but there is a proven way to manufacture luck on
command. I teach it all in my Magnetic Mind Power program - available now
when you go here.
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